How we see ourselves is often quite different from how OTHERS see us!

Lately it has occurred to me that so many of our challenges with people occur because we have no idea how others actually see us. Generally, we have our own view of ourselves, and it differs significantly from what others see.

Oftentimes when I'm photographing, I go for the unique perspective. Last week, for example, I walked out on a frozen Emerald Lake clear across to the other side so I could capture a unique perspective on the rocky spires looming above. Then, on Friday, I laid down on the ice of Lake Agnes and placed my camera on the surface, which enabled me to shoot a closeup of the unusual ice patterns that had formed twelve inches underneath. Most people, I'm guessing, would have walked right past them.

Similarly, it appears my own perspective on myself is actually quite unique. While I generally view myself as a sort of burned landscape - beautiful, to be sure, but full of faults that appear to me like charred vegetation - 

. . . other people may think I'm more like an imposing peak. At least that's the view that has been gradually dawning on me over the years. While I tend to see myself as an outsider with little say in many social situations, others may see things quite differently. Often - for reasons that are incomprehensible to me - it seems they want my approval. I'm gradually realizing that I must be careful about revealing what others might interpret as disapproval, especially when they view me as a bit of a mountain peak rather than as a heavily burned landscape!

Sometimes, it's interesting to note how often we project an unconscious energy out into our social environment and then act surprised when people react accordingly. For example, I'm familiar with a work situation where an employee has a habit of acting like a bully to others. Interestingly, he views himself as an oppressed outsider, and seems completely surprised when others react to HIS continual bullying with a bit of bullying of their own! In his view, the work environment is profoundly unhealthy, yet he can't seem to see that HE is the main cause of its negative aspects!

I would claim that each of us is, in many ways, like that employee. Unconscious of the energy we project, we act totally surprised when it comes back to us in unexpected ways!

What is the solution to this dilemma? Well, for one, we can work on being more introspective and owning up to our often unconscious attitudes. Secondly, perhaps we can make a practice of asking those close to us how we come across. I think we'll often be surprised at what we find out!

Photos: (Top) Rocky spires above a frozen Emerald Lake, Rocky Mountain National Park, CO, December 8, 2014; (Second) Unusual ice formations on Lake Agnes, Never Summer Range, CO, December 12, 2014; (Third) Hewlett Burn at sunset, Poudre Canyon, CO, December 6, 2014; (Bottom) Nokhu Crags, Never Summer Range, CO, December 8, 2014